My aunt used to live in Paris I remember, she used to come home and tell us these stories about being abroad And I remember she told us that she jumped into the river once, barefoot
Leapt, without looking And tumbled into the Seine The water was freezing She spent a month sneezing But said she would do it again
Here's to the ones who dream Foolish as they may seem Here's to the hearts that ache Here's to the mess we make
- La La Land
This one. Of all the songs I will learn to play on the piano, this is the first one I mean to master because I love the crazy, irreverent aunt. I thought of the song, as Maria, Ms. Kiki Parnasse, Luca, Anna and I coiled ourselves on blankets on the banks of the Seine at Pont La Tournelle, with Notre Dame Cathedral dazzling in the sunlight.
Laughter, weight of the little one as he slept on my chest, rosé, ratatouille and being hypnotized by the rustle of leaves in the breeze. Boats would pass by and some on board would wave but always just ahead of us. They waved to the future. The afternoon picnic was one of those moments that you know will imprint in the snapshot of memories.
And today, another image has formed. I saw Maria sing with her choir, Les Voix Libres. It was like seeing a night sky of fireflies, the sun outrunning a cloud, a volcano bursting forth. She had the unmistakable look of bliss as she sang and after she sang, and come to think of it, before she sang in anticipation of singing. Music has that girl's heartstrings. And we all fell in love. I want to plead with her....Run after that dream - it is not a side project. Everything else is.
She and I will train for the upcoming runs and her and Harold put me onto Nike Run Club. Hello! I love this app. You plug in your race date and it creates your running plan. So yesterday, I was all ready for my long run and it tells me to run 1km. I'm liking this already! It encourages you during the run and then it gives you a little clap when you've reached your goal. OK, so now I'm going to live for my digital coach's - You did it! How funny - virtual approval.
Which leads me to this - recently a friend said he saw my blog and that 'he was not convinced'. I don't know what he meant, and he has yet to tell me. I thought...convinced of what? I'm not trying to convince you.
It annoyed me and then it annoyed me that it annoyed me.
I want to tell him, this is not about your approval or convincing you.
I am doing this for me, to get it out (It being all the thoughts, experiences, adventures and fears) in the realest way I can - to write it. It is wonderful, but not necessary, that some find kernels of truths in my words that help them on their way. Or makes them smile. Or leaves them food for thought.
It makes me happy.
This project is for me to make concrete and to detail adventures and thoughts in a year where at the end of it , I will be forever changed. I will never be in the same version of my body again. And documenting the process means something to me.
Of this, I am convinced.
And what's more, like the aunt, I would do it again.